Wisdom from Archimandrite Thaddeus of Vitovnica.

FB_IMG_1545263633354“Now the forces of evil are trying to unite the human race in order to establish a “new world order” for the coming of the Antichrist. But it does not work. They wonder why, because they are so faithfully serving the devil? They complain to him that they can not complete the case because of the Orthodox. And the devil himself also complains that, because of the Orthodox, he cannot fulfill his hellish plan.
And as long as there are humble and meek souls among us who constantly pray that the Lord will not allow evil, for the sake of such souls the satanic plan cannot be realized, for them and for the sake of innocent children the sun still shines and God blesses us. ”

Archimandrite Thaddeus of Vitovnica

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What hapened to working on love?

I think so some times we think love is suposed to be a perfect easy thing which comes easy. Some thing never will make you feel pain,, and never be dificult or require effort and work.

I am not judging this woman,, I only want to give it as example. A woman I do not know well, I can say she is acquaintance. She and her husband have got 3 beautiful sons,, and if I ever saw a couple very in love I would say it was them. So beautiful couple who always was seeming very in love. I saw her on the weekend and she introduced me to her fiance, for sure I was feeling very shocked, and she said she had divorce from her husband before 6 months.

I can not judge her, I do not know theyre story. It is between them.and God. But I can feel,, what is hapening? Maybe in the situation of this woman and her husband it was bad circumstances, But it hapens with very many people. How many times people seem happy the one moment and the next moment they are divorced?

I know how it is to experience dificult times in your marriage, I know how it is to feel you are not strong enough to continue with the marriage. But we make vows, we make promise. To our spouse and to the Lord. When dificult times come,, and for sure they hapen, do we just quit? We say ok we are tired let us move to the next one and start again? What about the children? We can pursue our own “happyness” with the expense of our childrens?

Love some times is not easy, some times love will “crown you” and other times “crucify you”. This is what it means to be in this world, it is our ship and is not our home. We must to pray for strength to not throw love out of the door when only it needs a little bit of fresh air. We must to work for it.

Ignore the bad behavior and praise the good.

I have had some realisation today. The last one month has been a little dificult with the behavior of my toddler. It is not his fault, toddlers naturaly are trying theyre boundarys. It just hapened that me and him have spent most part of the last one month indoors.

We was going to a mother and child play group at Church from when he was 9 months!! At 2 years they start to go with out the mother for 2 hours 4 mornings in the week. In the start I was very frightened and said I did not want him to go with out me,, my husband, my Priest and the paeditrician said it is good for his social skills. Sure enough,, they was correct, my son become very much more calm at home, and his language skills improved very much.

Then situations come up that I was feeling it was better not to send him for some time. Many of the kids had viruses, and my boy had already had chicken pox and a bad cold. I did not want to risk a other sickness. And a family situation meanet that he was going to visit extended family less. Normally he was with his God mother or aunt or grand mother 2 hours 3 or 4 days in the week. Grandmother (my mother in law) has health problems and has been in the hospital, She had a surgery yesterday and thanks to God, she is doing well. (85 years old).

My son started to become very bored only with me all of the time and started to behave different. Hitting me and throwing things at me. Naturaly, when you feel pain you cry out! I noticed this reaction made the behavior more worse. The reaction to bad behavior encouraged more. It was like he considered it a “game” when he received so strong reaction to hurting mama. Then come the destructive behavior, I do not mind when he hits down the blocks we have just builded,, that’s normal. It is boys being boys and I think it is them understanding cause and affect. But for real reasons I started to have a problem with climbing in furniture and throwing ornaments! My reaction would be a strong “Oxi, kako!!” And shakeing my finger. It come to the point that he would anticipate this “kako!” (Bad) and say it and shake his finger to me before the word was even off of my tongue. And smileing also!
For the more part, it is normal toddler behavior, But it become that it was all his wakeing hours. We had a situation in the play area that he hit two other kids, and I knew I really had to change my approach to this new agresive behavior.

I decided that if we was in the house when the bad behavior occurred, I would not acknoledge it. I would ignore it. I would wait for the next good thing he did, and praise it more than normal. (Clapping hands and saying bravo!). I noticed that when I do this he wants to repeat the good behavior more. To give a example, he is now not throwing his food in the floor too much. He helps to put his Legos in the box. He did the last days the more adoreable thing ever, I was applyeing my make up and when I finished and set my cosmetic bag to the side, he took it and put it in the drawer that I keep it in. With all of this good behavior I make sure that he knows I am so proud he is being such a good boy. It is working. Reward is a much more good insentive than is punishment. And that is not only for children!! I think so we must focus less on the bad and more on the good behavior of skme one.

– ΓΕΡΩΝ ΠΑΪΣΙΟΣ

“Ὁ Θεὸς βοηθάει ἐκεῖ ποὺ πρέπει, ἐκεῖ ποὺ δὲν μπορεῖ ὁ ἄνθρωπος νὰ ἐνεργήση ἀνθρωπίνως· δὲν θὰ βοηθήση τὴν χαζομάρα μας. Ρεζιλεύουμε ἔτσι καὶ τοὺς Ἁγίους.

Ἀλλὰ καὶ ἂν εἶχε διάθεση νὰ κάνη αὐτὸ ποὺ μποροῦσε νὰ κάνη καὶ δὲν τὸ ἔκανε, γιατὶ κάτι τὸν ἐμπόδισε, ὁ Θεὸς θὰ τὸν βοηθήση σὲ μιὰ δύσκολη στιγμή. Ἂν ὅμως δὲν εἶχε διάθεση, ἐνῶ εἶχε κουράγιο, ὁ Θεὸς δὲν θὰ βοηθήση. Σοῦ λένε λ.χ. νὰ βάζης τὸ βράδυ τὸν σύρτη στὴν πόρτα καὶ ἐσὺ δὲν τὸν βάζεις, γιατὶ βαριέσαι, καὶ λὲς ὅτι θὰ φυλάξη ὁ Θεός. Δὲν εἶναι ὅτι ἔχεις ἐμπιστοσύνη στὸν Θεὸ καὶ δὲν βάζεις τὸν σύρτη, ἀλλὰ δὲν τὸν βάζεις, γιατὶ βαριέσαι. Πῶς νὰ βοηθήση τότε ὁ Θεός; Νὰ βοηθήση δηλαδὴ τὸν τεμπέλη; Ὅταν λέω σὲ ἕναν νὰ βάλη τὸν σύρτη καὶ δὲν τὸν βάζη, καὶ μόνο γιὰ τὴν παρακοή του θέλει τιμωρία.”

Lonelyness and older people.

Young woman holding hand of old man with walking stick
Young woman holding hand of old man with walking stick

Sometimes I think how crazy it is that in this so busy world, there are people lonely. We come together in our family’s and groups and have fun and we some times forget about the people who do not have it. Maybe we are not conciusly tryeing to forget it or ignore it, maybe sometimes we just can not even see it.

 

Especialy when we are in the younger part of our lifes, sometimes we are very busy and focused on other things. It can be very overwhelming, especialy if you are more introverted. There is so much to do, and if you are a parent you know that for sure! My father was a man who loved his schedule, in sickness in his last year’s it become more pronounce I think so because that is some thing he could control. Every day at 7 pm his favorite show come on the television, He liked to have his dinner at 6.15 so he would be relaxed ready to watch his favorite show. There was days I would feel overwhelmed with that in the last one year of his life. There was days I would give his dinner and not sit with him to watch his show, I would make myself busy with some thing else. If in that time I knew it I had only months remaining with my papa I would have sit with him all the time. I am sure he was feeling lonely many times that I was busy with the baby, or busy cleaning up and did not sit next to him. And then the times even I was not busy but I would go to my bedroom and sit to “breathe” for 2 minutes than become 10 minutes. I wish I could take back that, I wish he never ever was feeling lonely. I comfort myself by remembring he knew how much he was loved. And he was blessed with daughters who adore him.

 

Older people and sick people some times feel lonely very much. And I said above there is so many of us in this world, why must even one of God’s children feel lonely? My father was blessed because he had his daughters  (And we was blessed to have him). Some times I think about older people with out family and it makes me sad for them. I think we must all try to take some one in to our life who does not have many people. We will be company for them but we also gain very much from them. I talk very much with a older lady recentley who has had a dificult life God bless her. But you know we can spend 2 hours on the phone late at night!! Imagine – me 27 years old and she is 70. But we just can talk talk talk. We are not different, old and young. There is no reason for some one to be lonely. I want to make a effort to make friends and time for more people that are older and who do not have family or many friends.